Dear Andrew,

I am the mother of Brendan, one of your 3 roommates for the last 9 months.  Brendan always had good things to say about you and found you to be a nice kid.  Brendan found true freedom in being on his own and living in the apartment type dorms at UNO ... and seemed to find a great balance in that difficult college freshman year between going to school, studying, working, eating right, partying, working out, and being with his girl.  I feel very blessed and fortunate to be Brendan's mom.  And I am super proud that through two older siblings, he has seemed to take the lessons to heart and learn from siblings "mistakes".

Andrew, I am concerned for my child now.  He, along with another roommate found you deceased yesterday in your apartment.  I know he will harbor some guilt feelings.  I know the 9 months spent with you in this important year of life will be remembered ... and now, certainly treasured.  I listened for a while to my child and two of his friends, your friends too, last night as they sought to sort it out.  They talked of how much they liked you.  They talked that you would not want them to be sad; but rather, carry on and "go out and drink one for you".  Brendan got the call from your girlfriend to please go and check on you ... that's why he went back to the dorm.  They talked of how heart-broken your girlfriend is right now.  Andrew, I think so heart-brokenly of your family (though I don't even know how many that consists of at the moment).  And I think of what you must be thinking ... and I cry for you.  I cry for all of you.  My heart hurts for the shortness of your life and how you must be hurting to see all of the pain down below.

I am writing to you for two reasons really ... first to let you know that there is so much love for you down here.  And secondly, to let you know that everyone will be okay ... to hopefully allow you to release some of the guilt you must be feeling.  As each day passes, those that are left behind will be more understanding.  Your family will cry a lifetime, but you will (must) find the way to offer comfort in daily reminders (memories).  Your friends and their families will take notes and learn lessons.  And maybe, just maybe sweet child, another life will be "saved".  We all grieve for the joy you brought to lives.  Please know that no one "blames" you or judges you.  In time, we will all realize that God needed you more than we down here did ... be at peace dear, dear child.  Watch over your family and encourage them to find the strength.  Show them your love in the little ways possible.  I already know that in your death, you have given invaluable lesson to my own little family.  Be strong, dear Andrew.  Have peace.

Love,
Brendan's Mom